LIFE UPDATE ----------------------- Yesterday I made a new youtube video And I really loved the way I look in it, I love that I am getting better at my feminin voice and passing in general. My natural hair is growing fast too. I am happy and excited. I sometimes still miss C. but I feel much better about it all. I take the positives from that time and move on. The lows are not as low anymore. Oh I also been thinking a lot about sissyfication As I feel more and more feminin and feel like a girl, i feel myself drifting away from the sissy term. I still am super submissive, bottom and love to be in chastity. But when you go on hormones, your sexdrive changes a lot. Its weird. I don't know where this will go but it is what it is ^^
I just love it when Lina visits me! The mood is always so happy and uplifting we have lots of fun haha. Here is another clip and a rare view of my ass 😂😂👌
LIFE UPDATE : HORMONES -------------------------------------------- I'm over 10 months on hormones now!! Aaaaaah!! My life changed SO SO much. Sometimes i'd like to post a little update with all the details (as I promised). My real hair is a big mess now, but I need to get a haircut soon. Every 3 months I need to get the tips cut so it grows faster apperantly. I think in +- 6 months I will have a very feminin haircut! My boobs are still growing, I know that because they are very sensitive. The last couple of months, I became way more emotional. I also crave a connection more than sexual experiences. I prefer to date trans girls now... Guys is abit difficult, because most of them have a fetisj for people like me, they want to fuck me, but they don't want to take me to their family if that makes sense hahaha. Sometimes I really hate how I look, like without make-up or perfect camera angles and lighting, I can look different. But I hope more hormones will fix that haha. That is basicly everything to report! <3
LIFE UPDATE --------------------- I just made a new youtube video about my closure journey. It's crazy what a huge positive impact it had on me. Now it is over for me, I am SO done. It's like I ran a marathon and I finally reached the finish line haha. I feel so much better now that I have answers and it's closed properly. Just chilling now ^^
LIFE UPDATE : MY CLOSURE JOURNEY ----------------------------------------------------------------- I have been gone for a couple days! And I had a good reason for that. Before I share the story, please respect the privacy of C. Don't bother her at all. I will only share what I feel comfortable with, keeping her Privacy in mind. I cannot share the exact details.
About 4 days ago, I received a message on Whatsapp from C. She wasn't doing great. I'll spare the details. But it showed me that I wasn't the only one suffering from the breakup. I wanted to help her, get her back on her feet. She is an amazing person, and I want her to be happy. My selfish feelings are not as important as her happyness.
So to cheer her up, I came up with a little plan. I told her I'm going to send her a gift and some old items that she left here. But instead, I booked a trip to her home, to surprise her! I spend +- 15 hours traveling. The eurostar to london, and a taxi there to her place for the price of more than 1000 euro(!!!). I was in the cab, by myself, very nervous. I took a gamble. I obviously didn't want to bother her. But Judging by her text, I think this could help her. I bought her favorite gifts, and had some plans for the 2 days. I was going to stay in a hotel nearby.
I changed into my BEST dress, did my make up as good as I could. And eventually, I arrived at her place.
She opened the door in shock. But right away, I could see in her eyes that, she wasn't excited. She was confused. But she gave me a very long hug. It gave me some hope, that I did the right thing.
There are some private things I am skipping of course.
I could see signs, that she wasn't over the moon of me being there, but then other signs showed a different side. She took my heavy backpack and carried it for example. I didn't know what to think. But we went to my hotelroom.
It was a beautifull room. Very long curtains and much space. I gave her some gifts and we played her favorite game. During the game, I could see her smile again.
But when we started to talk, she made it very very clear to me that she had no feelings whatsoever. I guess i miss judged it. She was having a very bad time herself from the breakup and she didn't remove any of our photos together. I wanted to do the most romantic thing ever, travel so far away from home, just to spend a day with her. To cheer her up.
My heart sank. But I stayed strong. After all, my main goal was to cheer her up.
I told her that it is okay, and that she can choose any fun activity to do with me. She told me that I could choose myself, I could see in her eyes that she didn't want to spend time with me.
I told her, I want you to want this. If you don't want this, you can go home. I will respect your privacy and this will never never happen again.
Do you want to go home?
She nodded yes.
I gave her one last big hug and started crying.
And I closed the door behind her.
But... Surprisingly. After an hour of 2 of crying, I felt really good. I called my friend rachael belle to tell the story to her. She felt sorry, but she called it ''my closure journey''. And I guess that is a great way to look at it. It was my closure journey. I got closure and I got a lot of answers to questions I still had. I don't need to hope or wait or wonder about things anymore.
Our relationship got closure, in a very beautifull room. Its abit like a pretty funural haha.
The trip back was increadible difficult and hectic. I spend another 15 hours of traveling, but this time on trains and subways and a mix of taxis.
I got home happy, relaxed, and content. I had to do this. When I start a relationship, I go to the very maximum for us. And I am proud that I did what I could to save the relationship.
I closed that chapter and I can move on now. I can date, without feeling guilty.
That is all I want to share about this little journey. Please do not bother her. Don't mention my name to her as she is still healing too. Just leave it be, let it rest and let it be.
So yeah! :)
That is what happend. I am back home now. I slept well, I ate well, I look forward to the next chapter of my life. This one is closed.
10 Months on HRT update!! ---------------------------------------------- So, tomorow I will be 10 months on hormones.... The picture was taking yesterday and shows a more ''realistic'' look of me ^-^
So the first month, the biggest change for me was not having erections in the morning! I didn't notice anything else. Maybe I was a little bit calmer. I was also very self aware, I was looking for the changes constantly!
I had an orgasms in my 2nd month, without any cummies... the orgasm wasn't more intense, but it was different, the best way to describe it is like a mixture of a ruined orgasm and a real orgasm hahah. This scared me a little bit. No more cummies was scary.
Only at the 3rd month, I could feel my nipples getting sensitive. This sensitivity is not pleasure, its more painfull.
On the 4th and 5th month, I couldn't sleep on my belly haha, thats howmuch my nipples were hurting!! I didn't notice much else.
At the 6th and 7th month, I couldn't go for a run without wearing a sporting bra. To workout, I now need to wear a special bra! Omg.
At the 8 & 9th month, I got very emotional. I cried for everything. I never have been an emotional person, I can tell I act more emotional than before. Some days I feel very happy and some days I feel very sad.
Not eating much and making myself run for very long distances untill my body gives up helps a lot with weightloss! 😂 I'm probably in the best feminin shape of my life, that is cool!
LIFE UPDATE --------------------- I am doing a lot better! I don't think I am going to share much more about the Charlotte situation for a while. Just know that I am doing much much better now. I start to feel joy again and happyness! 😊 I have a lot to look forward to. I have 2 collabs planned with HUGE content creators in the near future!! I am super mega excited. These content creators are my examples, like litterly people I looked up to for so long and could only dream of getting on their level. But here I am!! Life is crazy!! I also started to meet some new trans friends and they are really nice to me. ^^ I think, this might sound stupid, but I don't want a Cis girlfriend anymore. If I date again, it would either be a guy or a trans girl. I think i still prefer trans girls but i'm open to giving the boys a chance too hahaha. Life goes on! Big thanks for all the support and lovely comments. As you know, I read all the comments!! And the messages, i try to answer every single day, but I have to admit, because of all the mess, I skipped a few days here and there... sowwy! Oh and yes, I am still looking for a Master. Might make a post about that later.
🖤🤍🖤🤍SISSY COW VIDEO 🤍🖤🤍🖤 Well, the content of me wearing NO wig is starting to get more popular yay!! (I am growing my hair!!! It just takes a while!!) So I made a little shameless video of me fucking myself for you. I think one day, after a couple months or so, I might release this video to everyone because I kinda want this video to be spread on the entire internet so everyone can see what a sissy bitch I am haha. Enjoyyyyyyyyyy
Today was a good day! My friend @linaroselina came to visit me! She loves to tease me... Aaaaaaaaaaaaaah. She was impressed with my feminization progress and she even fucked me today! Of course, we made sure to record all of it. Comming soon!!! I still have a couple very humiliating Cow photos and videos to share too!! P.S. I'm doing good. I am recovering, I am feeling better and better and I think I am slowly able to give it a place in my heart and make the best out of my life. Thanks for all the support and love I received. 🩷
LIFE UPDATE --------------------- I am not over Charlotte, and I probably never will. But I make myself to work hard. I work on that gamestore and I work at the appartment. I work for the sissy market and I do my onlyfans (I don't concider that work but still...) On top of that, I work on my health and fitness too. I keep working out a lot and eating very little. I am strong. I work on my feminization!
🤤Of course I can cum from anal🤤 (This video was made just before hormones, so I still had cummies haha, now I don't anymore)
If you want to experience a sissygasm yourself here are my most important tips : ❤️ Clean yourself ❤️ Use a lot of waterbased lube, really go over the top! The more the better. ❤️ Use a vibrating dildo ❤️ Stay in chastity for a few weeks before that
LIFE & HRT UPDATE ----------------------------------- Hello everyone! ❤️ I hope everyone is doing good! As you know, I'm still recovering from a heartbreak. The good thing about it is that because of the weightloss I finally look decent in Lingerie sets haha. My hair and tits have been growing too! Do you notice? I made these pics today! I am getting there, just a few more months and I can throw my wig in the garbage can I think! I have been consuming lots of porn. I want to go back to my roots, become a shameless, exposed sissy slut and this time, find a Master. Because I live on my own now. It's the perfect opportunity for guys to come over and fuck me. Right?! 😝😝😝
HORMONES UPDATE!! ------------------------------------- The picture is from a couple months ago (6 months on HRT). I am currently on 9 months almost 10! Thats crazy! 9 months in and the difference between 9 months and 6 months is huge. A lot has changed! In every part of my life! Mentally, to my body, but even my surroundings.
When I go out in public in a dress, 80% of the people just call me ''miss'' now, and that is so awsome. The other 20%, are not sure and use something neutral. I can see the hesitation on their face, but it is with good will. I know I am not completely there yet and that is okay. I feel feminin and I kinda enjoy this phase. This little in between fase.
My hair has grown to a point that it looks long(er) and feminin. You can't really see it on this picture but i'll post new pictures soon!
My boobs are growing a lot too. I can see a difference, and I think, even my nipples are.
I can also see some curves, not much, but my body looks more feminin.
I am also so much more sensitive. They said that you become really emotional on hormones, and for the first 6-7 months, I didn't experience that at all. But now, I can't watch sad movies because i'll cry so hard hahaha. Oh well.
My family and friends calls me Joyce and uses She/Her. This is because of Charlotte. She called me ''She'' and ''Joyce'' in front of my family and friends and now everyone does it. It feels right but it is still weird and something i need to get used to. My mom still calls me Jens and uses He/him a lot. but I don't blame her at all. She is used to that for so many years haha. She's old and she doesnt do it on purpose.
I wear a dress around friends and family. Something I thought I would NEVER do. But again, Charlotte gave me the strenght and now I am used to it.
My face looks more feminin too.
I feel very feminin. But sadly, currently my heart is abit broken. But I wanted to give you this little update about what its like for me now.
Helloooo everyone!! I have been receiving so much love and compasion! Thank you for that. Even Lina, a girl who pegged me messaged me. It reminded me of our pegging video together and I tought i'd share it with you! She wants to do another shoot soon! Enjoy!! 😊🩷
You might have seen the post on my X already. Charlotte and myself broke up. I will need some time to recover from this but i'll be alright. I'll make a youtube video tomorow explaining it a little bit more in detail. Don't worry too much. I am strong. It just hurts because I thought this was really it. I have no hard feelings for charlotte, and I wish her the very best and an amazing future.
Some wig & no wig pictures. During every day life, I don't wear a wig. But I do wear dresses, make-up and present feminin 24/7 now. That is still so crazy to me.
LIFE UPDATE ---------------------- Yesterday something bad happend to me. I am not sure how to share this and how much. I am so tired... The last 2 months have been amazing but... I worked so hard every single day. I am taking a break for 2 days and rest. I'll be fine, I just need some rest. ❤️
Yeah I don't suck strangers without a condom. But my girlfriend?????????? 🙈😊 Honestly, sucking cock and getting fucked by charlotte removed my nerves for cock haha, I am more cock hungry than ever before yum yum
Here is a little teaser of the full video that i will be posting in 2 weeks. ^_^ As always, for those who can't wait, you can get it earlier in your inbox. 🩷
