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pennyzeeof

pennyzeeof

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pennyzeeof posts

New Year. Same unhealthy need for constant positive reinfor..

New Year. Same unhealthy need for constant positive reinforcement. What's something new you want to see from me?

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I'm not awake enough to write a caption, so you'll just have..

I'm not awake enough to write a caption, so you'll just have to enjoy what you see OKAY

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December turns me into an absolute maniac. Which is very si..

December turns me into an absolute maniac. Which is very similar to every other month of the year, so. Two more days of work.... two more days of work...... two more days of work Do you like # one or two?

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You know what we don't talk about enough? Narwhals. What's t..

You know what we don't talk about enough? Narwhals. What's their fuckin deal? Anyway, I'll be waiting up all night on Christmas Eve in case Santa wants to trade his milk for my cookie..... And by Santa, I mean @zeeman87 . And by milk, I mean 2% with ice (shut up). And by cookie, I mean what you think I mean.

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Would rather pluck my arm hairs out one by one than go to th..

Would rather pluck my arm hairs out one by one than go to the mall today, but here I go.... Hairy arm fetish, anyone? No?

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Another dose of "I can't make a simple decision to save my l..

Another dose of "I can't make a simple decision to save my life, so here's the same exact photo in 2 filters that only differ very slightly". Life is hard, ya know? Drop a $12 tip here or in my DM to see a video & 20+ photos from this little moment I was having here....

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It's honestly rude that you guys didn't tip me $50,000 today..

It's honestly rude that you guys didn't tip me $50,000 today so I could stay here the entire month. I'm mad at you. We're fighting.

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Consider me your room service. What are you ordering? *wait..

Consider me your room service. What are you ordering? *waiting for comments about melons and/or glazed buns*

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Caption this in the most Penny way possible. Whoever is clos..

Caption this in the most Penny way possible. Whoever is closest to something I’d say wins …. Something. 🫡

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Who needs tattoos when you have natural stripes on your ass?..

Who needs tattoos when you have natural stripes on your ass? Thinking about a topless swim later tonight….

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Raise your cocks if you're a bright, feminine, colorful, cut..

Raise your cocks if you're a bright, feminine, colorful, cute lingerie kinda guy.... Pull my hair if you're a dark, black, sexy, kinky lingerie kinda guy I have a little of both coming to you... if you were at the live YOU ALREADY KNOW 👽 And if you weren't, you should be ashamed of yourself, you absolute moron.

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Are there many things better than decorating a Christmas tre..

Are there many things better than decorating a Christmas tree while some shitty movie from 1970 is on in the background? No. Except for watching me live & naked while some shitty music plays in the background. Now THAT'S fun. (tomorrow 8pm ET) Which pic makes you love me more? 1 or 2?

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Ok, sickos. I have a new camera, new lighting, & a lot of *..

Ok, sickos. I have a new camera, new lighting, & a lot of **new lingerie**. Let's **LIVE STREAM** this shit. I want to slip in & out of every piece of lingerie I own while you watch. And if you've been to one of my lives, you know how much I like to be watched.... When can you make it? Comment a sexy song & I'll add it to the playlist!

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Taking applications for men who have a cold toe fetish to sl..

Taking applications for men who have a cold toe fetish to sleep next to me and do nothing but hold my freezing toes all night while I sleep. Thanks!

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I will not be leaving the house from this point forward unti..

I will not be leaving the house from this point forward until temperatures reach acceptable levels. That's a fucking threat, weather. I will punch your wind in the face.

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***It's my birthday, my nasty pervs (love you)!*** I did so..

***It's my birthday, my nasty pervs (love you)!*** I did something I haven't done since Penny 1.0 .... guess what it is and I'll send it to you first! Guess wrong and I'll hunt you down and gut you like a fish (in a festive sort of way).

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my birthday suit for ***my birthday on Friday!!!*** 11/11 I'..

my birthday suit for ***my birthday on Friday!!!*** 11/11 I'm your wish (whoops 🤮 that was bad) anyway, here's my wish list: 1) new set of lungs 2) a couple thousand $ 3) lingerie 4) mani/pedi 5) a life 6) running sneakers 7) knuckle sandwiches 8) a better sense of humor 9) a partridge in a pear tree

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What's better than me in Calvins? Aside from the obvious (..

What's better than me in Calvins? Aside from the obvious (i.e. getting a good nights sleep and waking up not tired).

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Climb into my work from home bed with me? We can scream int..

Climb into my work from home bed with me? We can scream into our pillows together. (First sexually, then out of pure anger and disbelief that I have to work.)

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Trick or treat, whatever you do don't smell my dogs feet, se..

Trick or treat, whatever you do don't smell my dogs feet, seriously. Tip $5 to get 5 photo treats in this outfit (& out of it, obviously). $10 for 15 of them $15 for all 25 of them $20 for all 25 and a virtual high five 👻

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Guys, I think I have a fetish for the tiny gaps and creases ..

Guys, I think I have a fetish for the tiny gaps and creases on my body. Is there a support group for that? If you stared at the tiny space between my thighs for longer than 5 seconds, let's form an alliance.

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Saturdays are for the naked pictures I take of myself while ..

Saturdays are for the naked pictures I take of myself while my boyfriend watches college football. Where'd you zoom in first?

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If SNAP doesn't recover after this -25% hit, I may never rec..

If SNAP doesn't recover after this -25% hit, I may never recover. Rest In Peace to both of us. Also.... any GME bulls in here? 🫠 Anyway, here's my ass.

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Yup, still here. DO YOU EVEN LOVE ME STILL!? (very needy wh..

Yup, still here. DO YOU EVEN LOVE ME STILL!? (very needy when I'm sick)

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Anyone like to get sick and then sit on the bathroom floor n..

Anyone like to get sick and then sit on the bathroom floor naked and cry while looking at themselves in the mirror? Me neither.

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So0o0oo0 the camera on my iPhone is broken because I have bu..

So0o0oo0 the camera on my iPhone is broken because I have butter fingers (also, I love Butterfingers). BUT the selfie camera is still intact, my babies! Now excuse me while I scream.

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Swipe right if you like me. Lick the screen if you have pro..

Swipe right if you like me. Lick the screen if you have problems.

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Never underestimate 2 things: 1) my ability to strategically..

Never underestimate 2 things: 1) my ability to strategically cover my private parts without clothing 2) how big of a mess I can make within 60 seconds of looking for an outfit **Have you STILL not seen the ***other*** pics I took in this top?** 🫠 (that's your soul melting after you do)

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Guys, I think I need a new shirt

Guys, I think I need a new shirt

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What the hell, nothing matters, let's do some more ... maybe..

What the hell, nothing matters, let's do some more ... maybe if you tip me, I'll keep the face & lose the clothing.... Picture #1 or #2?

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