After the failed going live thing I sorta lost all my motiva..
Added 2022-05-07 16:02:25 +0000 UTCAfter the failed going live thing I sorta lost all my motivation and desire to keep not just the page but also the sissy thing going. The problem is I keep coming back, constantly checking to see if someone's sent a video, trying on my clothes, seeing girls and thinking fuck I wish I was her. I couldn't watch porn without thinking I want to be the girl, so I watched gay porn and all I thought was look at those cocks, those men so k watched lesbian porn and am back to wishing I was one of those girls. I haven't met up with anyone, haven't done anything because I've not felt like it but equally I don't feel normal, I don't feel straight because I'm still having the feelings. I know that there is no way back, these thoughts are imprinted on my mind but I need help taking them further. Stopping living the confused double life. I need to get back to the accepting state I was in before it went wrong and then push on even further. Home alone for the next 4 days so will be locked, plugged, and dressed 24/7 (apart from at work where I'm just locked). Get ready for some new content. Xx
