Strangely enough, I was actually on OnlyFans a couple of yea..
Added 2024-10-29 18:14:43 +0000 UTCStrangely enough, I was actually on OnlyFans a couple of years ago—purely to make some money. I posted a few suggestive photos with simple captions. I wish I could say, “It wasn’t for me” or “I’m above that,” but no. Honestly, I was just too lazy to put in the work—too lazy to post, too lazy to keep up conversations. I genuinely thought getting into med uni would be easier than running an OnlyFans page. And, for me, it really is. It’s easier to stick to a plan, to follow orders, than to try creating something on my own. That’s how lazy I’ve become.
And I’m ashamed of my weight. I get embarrassed looking at myself in the mirror. I never understood why. I see plus-size women online, I see my friends who are fuller-bodied—they’re gorgeous, they shine, they’re so stunning I can’t look away. But when I look at myself, all I feel is shame and pain. It’s like I can’t even see myself as a whole person—just fat, a belly, body hair. I want to scrutinize it, like bugs under a log, as something unpleasant. It feels like the issue isn’t the weight itself. It’s terrifying to admit just how much I don’t love myself, especially when I’ve built up this front of self-acceptance and confidence.
Incidentally, my previous account had the same name. When I deleted it, I didn’t even bother to withdraw the money. I was that sure of my future success. Or maybe I was just too lazy. Or maybe I thought I hadn’t really earned it.
